Benefits of Big Girls

Pretty much me. Except I can't sing to save my life. But thank you JerryLaVigneJr! 

I ain't settlin' for anything less then everything.

Sugarland - Settlin'

This song has become the theme song to my life, I think. 

I was talking to a friend of mine a while back, he's a great great guy. But maybe physically, not everyone's dream man. And he has his hmmm.. we'll call them quirks. Anyway, we were talking about people friend's have talked about us possibly dating.  He once had a friend try to set him up with another friend's socially delayed sister.  I once upon a time had someone try to set me up with his friend who suffered from major ADHD.  I'm not saying there's anything wrong with being socially delayed, or having ADHD, but why should I settle for dating someone's slightly handicapped friend?   I know how this might come across, and I apologize if that's how you interpret it, as I assure you that's not how I mean it..   From where we stood, it came across as insulting.  That's the point I'm trying to make here.  I'm sorry better words escape me when I'm ridiculously exhausted. 

What I mean is, just because I'm a fatty, and haven't had much luck in the dating department, why should I settle for someone who is so far from my idea of the perfect mate?  When it comes down to it, I'd rather be alone then know I'm settling on someone just for the sake of being with someone.  You know?  

Just because society views me as a lesser human being, doesn't mean I should date someone else society views as a lesser human being.  Why shouldn't I be 100% physically attracted to the man I'm with?  Why shouldn't he be on my level intellectually, maybe a little higher, even?  Why shouldn't I be with someone who is emotionally, mentally, psychologically stable?  Why should I have to settle for anything less then everything I want? 

Maybe I'm being a little selfish.  But this is the rest of MY life I'm talking about.  So I'm going to be selfish.  I'm not going to settle on meh, I'm going to strive for everything. 

Also, to update, Mr. Calls me beautiful, no mention of curves, is apparently too busy for me these days.  So, that's fine.  Because I want someone who has time for me.  Ain't settlin'! 

"You're beautiful, I love your curves."

Why can't they just stop at "You're beautiful."?  They always need to tack on that last little bit, calling me out on being a fatty.

Now, I'm comfortable with who I am.  Sometimes I even border on confident in my looks.  And who doesn't love to hear someone tell them how pretty they are??  I love compliments!  Keep 'em coming!  But why the need to remind me that I'm fat.  "You're pretty, but you're pretty because I'm into fat chicks."  Awesome... Thanks...

I think about 95% percent of the time someone's complimented my appearance they've added something about my extra bits.  More recently though, the gentlemen I'm currently dating, just straight up said "You're beautiful."  And wow, was that ever refreshing!  I didn't really think too much into it at that moment, but after the conversation I just had with a friend of mine, where the "You're beautiful, fatty." thing came up, I'm realizing just how nice it actually was.  I mean, he must genuinely find me attractive.  Not just because he has a fat fetish.  No, he just thinks I'm beautiful.

HALLELUJAH!

Moral of this story though, (Guys, listen up!) stop reminding me I'm fat.  I appreciate that you appreciate my curves.  But you don't need to keep telling me.  Or any of us for that matter.  Sometimes you just need to keep it simple.  It'll go a long way.  Guaranteed.

Thank you!!!!!!

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who reads this.

Every time I make a post I have so many people come up to me saying they read my blog, and how much they enjoyed it.

So thanks to everyone for your kind words and tremendous support!

I'm looking forward to posting much more, and much more often.

If there's any topics you'd like to read about, any questions you may have, please feel free to bring them to my attention.

Thanks again everyone! You're all amazing.

Reclaiming the word "FAT"

I have no problems whatsoever referring to myself as "the fat girl", "being the fattie" or just using the word "fat" to describe myself.

In my opinion, "fat" is just an adjective. Sure, I could dress it up, refer to myself as "pleasantly plump", "fluffy", the ever popular "curvy", but "fat" is short and easy, so why bother?

Apparently people find this word offensive. It seems to make the skinny folk uncomfortable when I use it. Maybe that's why I do... I enjoy watching the skinnies squirm. Muahahaha.

But when you think about it, if I were to say "Oh wow! You're so thin!" Chances are you wouldn't find this terribly offensive, more of a mere observation. But if I were to say "Oh wow! You're so fat!", chances are, if this were to you, or you overheard me say this to someone, you'd think, "Wow, what a bitch.." It's just an adjective!

On the other hand though.. I suppose it's one thing for me to call myself fat, but if someone else did I might feel offended.

I guess it's like the N word... If you're black, it's totally ok.

So if you're fat, well let's own the word!

Fuck yeah! I'm fat! Go team!

Ok, so I just got sort of lazy finishing this up. It's late, I'm tired, give me a break. :P

Bad Rep!

I'm not going to point any fingers here, and I'm not sure if I've touched on this before, but it's something that's been on my mind for a while, so let's put it out there!

Come now childrens, gather 'round, time for a story!

Once upon a time, there was a fat girl.  This fat girl didn't have much in terms of standards, and often boasted about her many sexual conquests. She wasn't really a woman of beauty or class, but alas, she was who she was. Anyway, this girl got around. And she wasn't exactly picky.

Now, that's fine and all.  If that's how you have chosen to live your life, good for you! Just you know, be safe, etc.

But here's where I have an issue. Because of her open door policy, many of her "conquests" are under the impression all fat girls have the same stance. "You want it, you got it!"

No. Just no.

And it's such a shame! She's giving us all a bad rep.

Now, I'm not some stuck up prude, guarding my flower and all that bullshit. But there is no reason for men to assume that just because I'm fat I'll come waddling over to jump your bones.

Anyway, there were a couple of other directions I wanted to take here. But that's where I'll go for now.

Fat friends dating friends?

I know alot of couples who have met through friends.

"Oh, I think I know someone who you might really hit it off with! I'll set something up!"

That's something I've never had said to me.

No one wants to set someone up with their fat friend.

Is it because they assume no one wants to date a fat girl? Or because they don't want their friend dating a fat girl?

I'm curious. Genuinely curious. When you are talking to that guy you've just met, or that guy you used to know from that place, and you think, "Man, I should really introduce him to *insert single thin girl's name here*." Why doesn't the single fat girl's name cross your mind?

Friends who are currently single, and not fat, almost constantly being "set up" with other single friends.

I'm not going to lie, I'm actually a little offended guys. I'm a fun person, genuine, sweet, nice, funny. And as far as fat girls go, I'd go so far as to say I'm kind of cute, pretty, even. Let's face it, I've got a pretty great head of hair, and my eyes, they're fucking gorgeous. So, where are all your single man friends? Hmmmm?